This Fall has felt a lot like falling down; my son had RSV in early October (along with how many other kids out there? Luckily, his case was mild). Since then, though, we’ve all been sorta congested and then just before Thanksgiving, I got pink eye!
To top it off, after Thanksgiving I ended up with pneumonia. Like my son and his RSV, I was fortunate to have mild symptoms with both the pink eye and pneumonia; if anything, these past few weeks have been sort of annoying and boring. But I recognized these two illnesses as opportunities, or even signs. My body was communicating with me to slow down and allow myself to rest.
There was a time when, in the mainstream mind, yoga was all about doing: practicing postures, meditating, breathing better, and chanting at kirtan. I think more and more, though, that we are collectively shifting away from yoga as an activity and more towards yoga as a way of lifestyle or mindset: from doing (something) to being (a certain way). Not that doing is all bad, but healthy living calls for a balance of work and rest.
Yoga Mama, I know how hard it can be to rest. We literally need reminders and encouragement to rest and maybe even specific techniques on how to bring ourselves into a state of rest. That’s what I want to share here: just telling yourself to relax doesn’t always work. Sometimes we have to sort of hack our own nervous system to coax our bodies and minds to relax.
Hack it to Relax it
The past couple of months, I’ve been in a therapy group called Trauma Resiliency Skills. The therapist running the group defined trauma as anything that overwhelms you so much you can’t cope in your usual way, or anything that dramatically changes your view of the world, yourself, and/or your relationships.
In one of my June posts, I talk about some big traumas that I experienced and how I used yoga to deal with the lasting effects of that trauma. But when I heard the above definition of trauma, it sort of struck me that motherhood is sort of like a series of small traumas. That’s not to say being a mom is bad for you; it all depends on what you do with that trauma. For instance, one person might turn to drugs or other addictions, while another person might seek out yoga or creative activities like music to deal with their emotions. It’s not the event that determines how deep the scar, but how the person receives that sort of wound.
Life is full of traumas, big and small; these wounds create tension and stress that lingers. So, how do we ‘hack’ our nervous systems to relax ourselves? This is what I’ve learned through the trauma resiliency group. I was pretty psyched to find that these skills were similar to the ones I’d been learning through this fantastic online Restorative Yoga course offered through Shut Up & Yoga that I’d been doing for months.
Some of the practices I’ve learned for resetting my nervous system are not traditional yoga practices, but they can be done with a yogic mindset. Here’s one of my favorite ones, and it’s kid-friendly, too, meaning you can do it with your little ones. Check it out in this post from October 2021.
Another practice that works similarly is to tense and relax all the muscles in your body. Here’s one way to do that explained in this article or you can explore the internet for other guides on this simple but satisfying practice.
I am My Own Teacher
You are your own teacher, too. That’s not to say you can’t learn from others, but your own intuition and felt sense of your unique body are so important in your yoga journey. So, in light of that, I’ve been digging back into some of my older posts to follow my own advice:)
I found some gems that provide accessible and fun ways to hack your nervous system. Along with shaking it out and tensing and relaxing, lengthening your exhalation is key. I often instruct people to count as they breathe to make sure the exhalation is longer than the inhalation. But sometimes this sort of fine-tuned breathing is not dynamic enough to shake things up. Here are a couple of posts using more vigorous methods to lengthen the exhalation when you just feel too stressed to sit and breathe quietly:
For those times when you’re extra stressed or frustrated, here’s a little yoga sequence to burn off that tension.
An Ounce of Prevention…
So now that I’ve dumped a whole bunch of ideas on you, put down this post and try one! It’s easy to read about things like this and decide it would be a good idea to try them next time you feel stressed, but…I suggest you try them before you get to that point. Practice them before you’re tense, angry, and out of whack. That’s why we call it yoga practice, right? We do it preventively so that when life brings you lemons, you know, you make that lemonade!
If you try any or all of these, let me know! I’m always interested in how helpful my advice is to readers. Even better, if you try these practices and like them, pass this post to another mama who might need a little nervous system hacking:)
Jai Ma!