You are only this

but you are also many things...

My son and I enjoying a rooftop tandem Adho Mukha Svanasana (Downward Dog)

“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players: They have their exits and entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts…”

-William Shakespeare

“My presence transforms me, not my past or future. My presence allows me to meet the moment as the me I want to be—my best Self, my True Self. The rest is out of my control.”

-Ashley Zuberi, How embracing the present moment transforms your life

Motherhood is too complicated. We know too much, so now we’ve become not just parents, but also psychologists, nutritionists, playmates, tutors, and coaches for our kids. We rush to fill in the gaps our parents never even saw in our own childhoods and then we get frazzled. It’s all too much, and most of it is trial and error.

This is a little love letter to all the moms who have ever had this momentary thought: I’m just a (stay-at-home) mom. In being a mom, you are immersed in it (or sometimes drowning it in); but within that role as a mom, you are SO many things. Motherhood is multi-faceted.

Being a human being is multi-faceted, too. You are your body, mind, thoughts, emotions, experiences and at the same time, you are not really any of these things. They are just parts of your life. In yoga there is this concept of the True Self, which, whether you consider yourself a spiritual person or not, is simply the witnessing part of your mind that notices how your body and mind interact with the events of your life and the world around you.

We gather roles, labels, identities: I am a daughter, but also a mother, sister, wife, friend. I am a teacher and a writer. I am a California girl living in Chicago, but I’m also Filipina American. I am all those things at the same time that none of those things tells the story of who I really am, which is the True Self.

This is why many yoga teachers sometimes tell you in class, “Let go of your personal stories, and just be present, be here with the body and breath.” It’s not that those stories don’t matter, but they are not your True Self. The True Self is also sometimes called The Witness and it’s a receptive part of you that notices how you embody all your different roles, labels, and identities. In the Witness state of mind, you pay less attention to the flow of time and abide more in the present moment.

Have you noticed this while doing something that puts you in ‘the zone?’ Yoga can offer us this heightened perspective, but so can other activities like dancing, playing or listening to music, going for a walk, enjoying a beautiful view, cooking, making love, chatting with a good friend…the list goes on.

So the next time you find yourself going through the motions on your yoga mat, at work, with your kids, driving down the street, or in any area of your life, pause. Get back into that Witness state. It takes some practice. It actually takes a lot of practice, and guess what? There’s no performance. Life is all practice.

So what am I going to teach you today? What technique or tip am I offering here for busy mamas? Just to stop and remember, you are more than just your body, emotions, thoughts, and history. You are more than your roles and responsibilities, your wounds and your victories. I can’t convey the totality of this to you, but you can experience it with consistent, steady practice. Find that thing that puts you in the zone, whether it’s yoga practice on the mat or something else. Then ask yourself, who is doing this? Who is experiencing the sensations, emotions, and thoughts as I do this? Is it the mama in you, the (insert job position), the friend? Is it all those or none of them?

One way to get in the zone is to bring more attention to the layers of yourself. Even though you are more than your body, emotions, and mind, they are our tools for remembering our True Selves. Here’s an old post I wrote on the koshas, those layers of our being that help us to think, feel, move, and act in the world.

What puts you in the zone? Please feel free to share! And if your answer is yoga, what types of practices or poses put you in that state?

I’m always curious what topics readers want to here more about: specific yoga postures, yoga sequences, breathing and meditation techniques, or yoga philosophy? Or even the issue of finding time to practice and staying motivated (after all, without that, no other information here matters!). Please let me know. Every mama has a unique life and situation, so what I might prioritize and focus on could be much different than you!